Self-sabotage

Guys, it's time I admit it: I've been self-sabotaging.

The past few weeks my weigh-ins have been a little bit of a loss or a little bit of a gain, but no major progress/regress has been made. And it's all my fault. Sure, I've admitted to being a lazy points tracker but it's more than that. I haven't been tracking points because I've been making lousy food choices and I've been too embarrassed to track them. Well, also lazy. And I've been drinking more beer and wine than I really should be.

Wow, it feels good to finally admit this.

I've said I want to find a balance in my lifestyle, something I can sustain weight-wise but that will also make me happy. Thing is, I haven't been trying all that hard. I did so well at the beginning because I was trying, I was making smart choices, I was being honest with myself. Now, I'm just taking too much for granted.

And while I'm being honest, I'm struggling with finding my groove again.

To get back on track, I need to figure out where the self-sabotaging is coming from and I had a bit of a breakthrough on this last night. I've been having a hard time with stress eating ever since we started house shopping. I've tried to play down the stress but it's there and not just the stress of finding a place but the stress of getting our condo ready to sell - and that's the bigger issue. There is so much to be done and we're starting but nothing major can really happen until we buy a place and have schedule to work with. And the house hunt has consumed all our free time, whether it be for viewings or prepping the condo. I tried to go out of town this past weekend and had to cut my trip short to view a house - and the house was a piece of shit.

So now what? Now that I know what the stressors are, does everything get fixed? And what about the bigger theme here, namely how do I deal with stress without sabotaging myself?

None of these questions are easily answered, but as the saying goes, the first step is admitting you have a problem.

If only finding the solution were so easy....except I know the solution. It's just getting from "knowing" to "doing" that I have to work on.