Wednesday, June 3, 2009

Because stress is fun!

Those who know me well know that I can be, erm, rather passionate about things (i.e. I tend to freak out/spazz/overreact most, if not all, of the time). However, I feel that my latest cause for freak-out is justifiable and I really need to, well, kind of freak out about it.

I am currently working at Rogers on a maternity-leave contract which will end in September and I am severely panicked and freaked about being unemployed. I'm doing my due diligence now, trying to stay in touch with industry people I know and checking out the job postings and such, just to get a feel for what is out there, and I'm told there is still the possibility of something coming up at Rogers (my boss has alluded more than once to wanting to keep me). But since I can't pay the bills with networking and possibilities, I've been finding myself laying awake at night on more than one occasion, seriously stressed about this.

When I took the job last August, it seemed like the right thing to do. I mean, it was Rogers Publishing, working on Chatelaine and so what if it was only contract because something would work out at the end, right? I'm sure that would have happened if the economy hadn't decided to nose-dive shortly after I started, resulting in lay-offs a mere four months into my contract. This was followed by more layoffs four months after the first round and the rumour of layoffs every quarter. Fun.

Aside from a crappy economy and sparse job prospects, what really sucks is that I love what I do and I'm good at it and I love doing what I do at Rogers. I work with awesome people and it's a good (albeit really corporate) environment and I have fun there. Argh.

I'm trying to be positive and smart about this and plan for any and all possible outcomes but since I am who I am, I will stress and worry and panic and fret about this until the bitter/sweet end. THIS is what sucks the most.

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