Monday, March 31, 2008

I write terrible poetry

hai-ku: (noun) a major form of Japanese verse, written in 17 syllables divided into 3 lines of 5, 7, and 5 syllables, and employing highly evocative allusions and comparisons, often on the subject of nature or one of the seasons.

Warm breeze, flowers, sun
Have not yet arrived for me
Stupid ick weather

Sunday, March 30, 2008

I don't get it

odd: (adjective) differing in nature from what is ordinary, usual, or expected.

Today at the gym, there was a girl working out in a white sports bra and a pink and white cheerleader-style skirt. Rah-rah-sis-boom-bah? I don't get it.

Saturday, March 29, 2008


yo-gurt or yo-ghurt or yo-ghourt: (noun) A custard-like food with a tart flavour, prepared from milk curdled by bacteria, especially Lactobacillus bulgaricus and Streptococcus thermophilus, and often sweetened or flavored with fruit.

I don't care how you spell it, it's gross. Ugh, that half-liquid, half-solid slimy mess...blech. I used to eat yogurt but I never really liked it then. Not sure why I forced it down, but never again, I tell you. NEVER!!

Of course, now yogurt is one of those "super foods" that has all this good bacteria and regulatory biotics (pre- and pro- and maybe suf- and anti-, who knows) and there are all these commercials of women in their workout wear eating yogurt like it's the equivalent of stopping the seal hunt, but in a convenient lunch-sized package. And it's creamier! And you can take the Activia challenge! And Danino has some brain-building something-or-other for kids, so you have no excuse for having stupid children! And it has more fruit, so the package is transparent so you can see how much fruit is in there!

(Can you please tell me why the commercial for this transparent container shows strawberries with their hulls? Shouldn't that be taken out before the berries are added to the goopy, icky, gelatinous crap?)

Well, I see you, yogurt. I see you taking up shelf after shelf after shelf (after shelf after shelf after shelf after shelf...) at my grocery store. I see you and your fancy containers and your healthy-diet-ness and your "Take the challenge!" propaganda. But, yogurt, if you're so great, why haven't you stopped global warming, hm? Or, how about finding Jimmy Hoffa? What about that? And if you're so useful, how about getting the Leafs into the play-offs, eh? What? You can't? Well, who's all high and mighty now? Yeah, that's right, you just go back to the digestive tract, where you belong.

Hey! Pudding! Don't you run away! I'm coming for you next. Bwa-ha-ha!!!

Sunday, March 23, 2008

What will happen next?

change: (noun) a transformation or modification; alteration.

I'm ready for it. Time to change things up. Nothing major, mind you, but enough to make me happier. I guess it's more a modification I'm after than a transformation, but I need to make a change. I've put out some feelers to see what will be possible and now I just have to wait and see what happens. Hopefully, within a couple weeks, I'll know. And I'm going to do what I need to do to make myself happy. Some people might not agree with the decisions I make but I'm not here to please them, I'm here to please myself. So there!

It's rather exciting, actually. Just need to be patient and see where things go, but it just feels like things will work out in my favour. Yay me!!!

Sunday, March 16, 2008


un-a-bashed: (adjective) not concealed or disguised; obvious.

Today, while walking up Spadina, I saw a rather burly black man, sitting in his car, rocking out and air-drumming to Kelly Clarkson's Behind These Hazel Eyes.

On another note, tomorrow is the first day of Act Happy Week. He may have started early, but to this random yet joyous act of air-drumming, I tip my hat.

Tuesday, March 11, 2008

I never was very good at math

do-zen: (noun) a group of twelve.

I baked cupcakes tonight, because tomorrow is Jack Kerouac's birthday and we're celebrating at work. Do with that what you will.

But back to baking cupcakes. And in baking cupcakes, one requires cupcake liners. Not knowing if there were any at home (of course, there were) I bought a pack of 75, because they come in packs of 75. However, cupcakes are baked in pans of 12, or a dozen at a time, if you will.

75 / 12 = 6.25

So why? Why do cupcake liners come in packs of 75, when you clearly cannot make an even number of cupcake batches to use them up? Is it that hard to sell them in packs of 72? I would pay the same amount. I guess they're banking on people like me simply forgetting that there are already cupcake liners at home and buying them willy-nilly, therefore negating the need to use the liners of one package up before moving on to a new one.